Be A Better You: Happiness

Showing posts with label Happiness. Show all posts

Genuine Happiness from Within

By Michael Cobb
http://www.be-a-better-you.com

Genuine Happiness from Within

Life isn’t the sweetest candy. Sometimes, when I feel like the world is just too heavy, I look around and find people who continued to live fascinating and wonderful lives. And then thoughts come popping into my mind like bubbles from nowhere – “How did their life become so adorably sweet? How come they still can manage to laugh and play around despite a busy stressful life?” Then I pause and observed for awhile… I figured out that maybe, they start to work on a place called ‘self’.

So, how does one become genuinely happy? Step 1 is to love yourself.

My theology professor once said that “loving means accepting.” To love oneself means to accept that you are not a perfect being, but behind the imperfections must lie a great ounce of courage to be able to discover ways on how to improve your repertoire to recover from our mistakes.

Genuine happiness also pertains to contentment. When you are contented with the job you have, the way you look, with your family, your friends, the place you live in, your car, and all the things you now have – truly, you know the answer to the question “how to be genuinely happy.”

When we discover a small start somewhere from within, that small start will eventually lead to something else, and to something else. But if you keep questioning life lit it has never done you any good, you will never be able to find genuine happiness.

I believe that life is about finding out about right and wrong, trying and failing, wining and losing. These are things that happen as often as you inhale and exhale. Failure, in a person’s life has become as abundant and necessary as air. But this should not hinder us from becoming happy.

How to be genuinely happy in spite all these? I tell you… every time you exert effort to improve the quality of life and your being, whether it is cleaning up your room, helping a friend, taking care of your sick dog, fail on board exams and trying again, life gives you equivalent points for that.

Imagine life as a big score board like those which are used in the NFLs. Every time you take a step forward, you make scoring points. Wouldn’t it be nice to look at that board at the end of each game and think to yourself “Whew! I got a point today. I’m glad I gave it a shot.”, instead of looking at it all blank and murmur “Geez, I didn’t even hit a score today. I wish I had the guts to try out. We could have won!” and then walk away.

Genuine happiness isn’t about driving the hottest Formula 1 car, nor getting the employee of the year award, earning the highest 13th month pay, or beating the sales quota. Sometimes, the most sought after prizes in life doesn’t always go to the fastest, the strongest, the bravest or not even the best. So, how do you become genuinely happy? Every one has his own definition of ‘happiness’. Happiness for a writer may mean launching as much best selling books as possible. Happiness for a basketball rookie may mean getting the rookie of the year award. Happiness for a beggar may mean a lot of money. Happiness for a business man may mean success. So, really now, how do we become genuinely happy? Simple. You don’t have to have the best things in this world. Its about doing and making the best out of every single thing. When you find yourself smiling at your own mistake and telling your self “Oh, I’ll do better next time”, you carry with you a flame of strong will power to persevere that may spread out like a brush fire. You possess a willingness to stand up again and try – that will make you a genuinely happy person.

When you learn to accept yourself and your own faults. You pass step 1 in the project “how to become genuinely happy”.For as long as you know how to accept others, you will also be accepted. For as long as you love and know how to love, you will receive love ten folds back.

Again, throw me that same question “how to become genuinely happy?”. I’ll refer you to a friend of mine who strongly quoted- “Most of us know that laughter is the best medicine to life’s aches and pain. But most of us don’t know that the best kind of laughter is laughter over self. Coz then you don’t just become happy… you become free.”

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Article provided by Michael Cobb. Visit Michael's Self Help, Self Improvement, Motivation and Personal Growth website at http://www.be-a-better-you.com/articles or the Self Help, Self Improvement, Motivation and Personal Growth Blog at http://be-a-better-you.blogspot.com for more great articles, tips and resourses.
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Miscommunication - Root Cause of Problems?

By Michael Cobb
http://www.be-a-better-you.com

Miscommunication - Root Cause of Problems?

People of two opposing ideas can stir up arguments
and fights. It's that situation when one thinks
he has the right concept while the other one also
believes he has the proper notion. Both of them
would try to outsmart each other until one claims
victory.

Here's an actual example.

My spouse would sometimes buy me signature
clothing. When my Mom founds out how much it costs,
she would advise us to budget our money and just buy
the affordable ones.

A problem occurs when my spouse thinks that her effort
to give me the best was unappreciated. Mom, on
the other hand, would think that my spouse is such
a spender.

There's a conflict with their beliefs. No two
people are exactly alike. We are totally unique;
not only physically, but mentally and emotionally
as well.

There will be many times when your opinion will not
correspond with that of another. So how can people
prevent this kind of conflict from occurring?

Communication is the key to overcome doubts and
misunderstandings.

You should let other people know what's in your mind.
Don't keep them guessing.

There was a story about two couples who were filing
a divorce. After the lawyer have spoken to them
both, he found out that the root cause of all their
problems was due to miscommunication.

Here's one of the couple's problems.

The man filing the divorce said that he just hated
the breakfast meal that his wife often prepared for
him. On the other hand, the wife said that she's
only preparing the meal because she thought it was
her husband's favorite. But she never liked cooking
it because it's very difficult to prepare.

See? If only one of them took the initiative to
speak out what's in his or her mind, then that
particular dilemma would be over.

Now why would people prefer to keep their complaints
and criticisms to themselves? What's holding them
back?

It's because they do not want to be rejected. Most,
people, if not all, would like to be accepted and to
be perceived as likeable in the eyes of others.

So can you get your message across without hurting
their feelings?

Substitute negative statements with positive ones.

Instead of saying "You don't understand," say "Let
me explain." Instead of remarking "You're wrong,"
say "Permit me to clarify." Instead of stating
"You failed to say," just mention "Perhaps this was
not stated."

There are certain words that affect a person more
negatively in comparison with other words that have
the same meaning.

Nothing could be more pleasing to the ear than
hearing someone else say that you are right. In
this case, be prepared to let other people know that
you respect their opinions. You may add your comments
at the end, but acknowledge them first.

Say:
You're right, although ...
Great suggestion, however ...
I agree with your opinion, however ...
I would feel the same way if I were you, although ...
I understand your situation, however ...

Reassure your counterparts that the decision made will
benefit both parties. People need to feel that they
have made the right choice.

Communication is a gift. Use it wisely for everyone's
advantage.

Positive Thinking: A 7 Step Guide

Image via Wikipedia

By Michael Cobb
http://www.be-a-better-you.com

Positive Thinking: A 7 Step Guide

I'm sure you have a bright idea hidden somewhere in the back of your mind that you just can't wait to test out. Of course you're not the only one with the bright idea. So what motivates you to churn those creative, or even inspiring juices to its utmost flavor?

It's always best to set up a personal goal where you can accomplish the most in record time, maybe like mowing the lawn in an hour before the big game on TV. A correct and positive attitude in whatever you do will make things easier, and even enjoyable.

Here are some tips to make it through the week even if you're just sitting in your favorite couch. An idea takes time to form in your head and is always at work while you are busy sitting.

Having a bit of positive thinking can help you realize things that are never thought possible. Thinking big is indeed the American Way and that what made our country prosperous.

1. Take passionate action towards living your life by design. Talk is cheap. Action = deposits in the bank of a passionately authentic future. Without it, passion is void.

This is a perfect example where dreams are made of where you start by tinkering with your mind, then with your hands. And if the idea weakens, you can always go back to it later until you finish it.

2. Commit to yourself as well as those you love to create powerfully a life you can love. Instead of reacting, commit to creating from your heart and soul, out of love rather than fear. The American Dream will always be there, but a dream will still be a dream without motion. Be amazed as the transformation begins.

3. Recognize and embrace the thought that each moment is perfect regardless of its outcome. Every time you hit on something that may appear too extreme, why not give it a shot and see if it will work. You will be surprised to see of there are other ways to get the task done in time. If you are not pleased with the outcome, decide to use that moment to learn from and make the appropriate shift.

4. Dwell completely in a place of gratitude. Learn to utilize what you have in your hands and make use of it in the most constructive way. Slipping into neediness will become less of a habit when you repeatedly shift towards gratitude, away from poverty consciousness.

5. Use a Passion Formula of Recognize/Reevaluate/Restore in place of the Shoulda/Woulda/Coulda whirlwind. The former is based in increased knowledge and abundance while the latter focuses on scarcity and lack. As you face people or tasks that may seem harder than scaling the summit of the Himalayas, allow yourself to realize that the task is just as important as giving out orders to your subordinates. You would rather be richly passionate!

6. Keep humor at the forefront of thought, laughing at and with yourself when possible. You may find yourself quite entertaining when you loosen up! I am yet to see a comedian ever go hungry even though his jokes are as 'old as great-grandma'. Life has so much to offer to allow you to mope around in self pity. Humor is very attractive, very passionate: life-giving.

7. Believe that you are the architect of your destiny. No one can take your passionate future from you except for you! Create your life authentically. As long as there's still breath in your body, there is no end to how much you can accomplish in a lifetime. The concept of thinking big is all about enjoying your work, which would lead to celebrate a discovery that is born within your hands. Watch everything flow into place with perfect, passionate precision.

It's interesting how people get wallowed up by something trivial as learning to use a computer, when nowadays that top computer companies are manufacturing software that even the kids can do it. I don't mean to be condescending, but that's the idea of not having any positive thinking in your life-you'll just end up as a dim bulb in a dark corner. So instead of subjecting yourself to what you will be doomed for, make your path by taking the first step with a positive attitude.

The True and Magnificent Power of Giving

By Michael Cobb
http://www.be-a-better-you.com

The True and Magnificent Power of Giving

You've probably heard of the popular saying "It's better to
give than to receive." But do you actually know what hidden
power lies within this magnanimous act known as "giving?"

When you give something from your heart without expecting
anything in return, you release a powerful force that will
trigger your good deed to "bounce" back to you in amazing,
and sometimes unusual ways.

I firmly believe that whatever you impart to others will
come back to you a hundred fold. You are doing yourself a
big favor by helping someone in need. By doing even the
smallest acts of generosity, you are inviting good vibrations
to come into your life.

You would be earning the respect and love of your recipients.
You know that you will always have a loyal group of friends
who would help, protect, and do anything for you just because
they feel that they have to repay you in any way they can.
Most people would have the urge or drive to reciprocate any
act of kindness you've shown them.

However, this does not mean that you must expect them to repay
you. Give without any expectation of rewards. Don't do it
just because you have an ulterior motive. Give unconditionally.
Give because you are happy doing it. The universe will get
back to you in its own special way.

Speaking of happiness, the act of giving can summon the spirit
of joy to come into your heart. How would you feel when you've
given something to your less fortunate neighbors? Let me tell
you that nothing could brighten up my day more than hearing them
express their most heartfelt gratitude and seeing their smiles
extend from ear to ear.

Giving is also a healthy habit. It could prolong your life by
instilling within you an inner sense of peace and accomplishment.

Just like all things in life, giving has its limitations.
Being too generous can have its toll. Your kindness might be
taken advantage of and people might abuse your good intentions.
Beware of individuals who are continuously seeking your aid.
It's better to teach them how to solve their problems than to
always attend to their needs.

As one saying goes ...

"Give them some fish and you'll feed them for a day. Teach them
how to fish and you'll feed them for a lifetime."

Lastly, here's what I consider the most important rule about
giving. Keep your good deeds to yourself. Don't announce to the
whole world that you've donated $100,000 to your favorite charity
or that you've helped save a child from a life-threatening
disease.

If you really desire to give, do it secretly and in private.
Some people would write "anonymous" rather than their own names
when they've made a contribution. The universe smiles upon
these individuals, and they will get their just rewards in due
time.

Now that you know how wonderful it is to give, would you go out
to the world and share your blessings?

Be A Better You

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Genuine Happiness from Within

Miscommunication - Root Cause of Problems?

Positive Thinking: A 7 Step Guide

The True and Magnificent Power of Giving

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